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(Original Date Posted- 25th December 2009)
Merry greetings my random fans, lets start on with the ninth entry, the most important one of this month. Firstly though, lets open the comment box up and see if I was left a steaming ****.
Shelly smellay (WTF is up with your name)- Short, but all right. Merry Christmas, I guess.
Abby Lever- Damnit, I should have mentioned that coca cola advert with the truck. I mean, while the drink is basically caffeine, splenda and horse urine, the advert’s great to watch when you’re like, 4 (Or any other age when Christmas at least seems magical). And Polar express and Nightmare before Christmas weren’t bad. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Polar express is kinda ‘gay’, but nightmare before Christmas I’ve heard is pretty good. Hopefully I’ll watch it this Christmas.
And wow, you seem to have extraordinarily high expectations for yourself. But that’s all right, I mean, I one day want to be as famous as the AVGN and Nostalgia Critic. Who knows, maybe everything will turn out that way. But still, relax (Wow, has this turned into a help forum
(Me)- So, how long have you been in your relationship 4
(Random Chump)- 18 months. Its just been so demanding and long, that I want to strangle somebody
(Me writing ‘Needs to be put in an asylum, or deep hole’)- Ah, I see)
Yeah, aside from that random venture into agony aunt style writing, in case I don’t say it beforehand (Which I doubt), I hope you have a lovely Christmas, I do.
Todd Webb- You hated Robbie the Reindeer 0.0. It wasn’t that bad, seriously. I mean, while Britney Spears makes me feel slightly sick, she isn’t enough to make it that bad. Ahh well, I guess it cant be perfect.
You’re welcome as well. I may not have known your granddad, but from the sounds of Louisa’s comment, he must have been a great man. Again, Im sorry for your loss.
Louisa Hillman- I CANT DO AN ENTRY SOLELY ON WIND (What if it finds out, seriously it’ll hunt you down and blow you off a cliff). But real reason, I think its too small a topic, and would need to be joined to something larger, so there’s still a possibility of me talking ‘bout it, just with something else as well.
Anyway, now that’s out of the way…
CHRISTMAS :D
Yeah, that ultimate season of the year (Besides your birthday (Yes, I believe birthdays count as holidays)), that special time of the year, the one where you are united with your family in festive cheer and love, where you are truly glad to be surrounded by such good people
Bull****
I think I can safely say that Christmas has probably lost all true meaning, and that now it is virtually composed of money, presents and getting so drunk that you probably lose a fifth of your life expectancy. It seems to me that hardly anybody truly embraces the morals of it anymore, and if you do, I commend you.
I guess that’s due to people becoming less religious on a whole. Me, well Im agnostic, but for most people, its probably down to increased rationality (Ie. Stuff like fossils, environmental disasters). But, for the sake of this entry, let’s focus on those little ideals of Christmas that make it so uniquely jolly (Besides Christmas specials, already done that >.>, unless you want another rant)
As our first random ideal, lets focus on decorations. My god, what a waste of money, time and effort. Seriously, it’s a pain in the ass to get them out of the attic/cupboard/random area, and when you put them up, you realize you have to put them away in January. Its just tedious as all hell, and when you see houses that have as many decorations as Angelina Jolie has vaguely cute children with weird names (Sorry, cheap shot, just had to go there)
It just makes you want to grab a lighter and some alcohol (Be prepared to go to prison…oh, and be prepared to be raped in the showers…it’s a F**ked up world out there :)
Also, while it may not always be bad, relatives are usually a problem, especially if they’re the type that you almost never see. It can range between awkward happiness (lolpinesslol) and annoying tension, kinda like how George Lucas feels about Star Wars currently (2 comparison jokes FTW), but still it depends on how it is for you. But my opinion stays, it is f**king dreadful
Oh yeah, and what about those little useless gifts you get as well, like…
-Deodorant packs (Gotten every Christmas for about 5 years)
-Mugs
-Pencil kits
-Teddy bear like things (Plush toys perhapz)
-Clothes that you’d rather burn (Pyromania FTW)
-Socks
The list goes on, and I know, ‘good will’ and ‘it’s the thought that counts’, but hell, they only go so far. Like, besides the necessary things (Socks and…oh, you have to be messing with me, nothing else!?!), and the slightly better gifts (Plushie toy thingies…and again, nothing else), why would they make those gifts if they know they’ll end up being sent unwrapped/crudely wrapped as a message virtually saying, ‘Hey, I don’t really care for you that much, so take this as a cheap gift’. I get slightly offended when Im sent gifts like that, but this is a little too depressing (and slightly a**hole-ish), so lets move on to something more postive.
Ahh yes, that childhood idol of are…childhoods I guess…Santa claus (Or Father Christmas, or Pierre Noel, or some other weird name (Is Angelina Jolie Santa’s mother?)).
Santa Claus is a great figure/role model? for little children, and that’s almost solely due to the pinpoint fact that he gives away free stuff. Now that’s a fat guy I can get behind (Anybody got a Santa suit?)…(and that joke ISN’T perverted). And hes evolved naturally through time as well, for example, he used to be green and white, but Coca cola actually managed to change him to red and white, cos’ Coca cola’s colour is red (They seem to be the masters of mental manipulation, don’t they). And although Im trying to avoid the matter of his existence for a certain fan, hes an eternal part of our existence, and I think the best way to describe our joy of him should come from none over than Will Ferrell
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jyCfRHumHU
Okay, that speech was too short, and too cheesily powerful. Anybody got some extra strength eggnog so I can forget it?
* Chugs down some stolen from a random shop*
Ugh, okay, as long as I don’t read the above, I’ll be fine. Or at least I hope I’ll be fine. Anyway, I think I can retain consciousness for one more holiday topic, so let’s cover advent calendars, because hey, they don’t get enough of a spotlight (YOU WILL WORSHIP THE ADVENT CALENDER)
Yeah, this is kinda the same deal as with useless presents, because there are some really good calendars out there (like maltesers calendars :p), and there are the really cheap ones (Like the failure that is the transformers one). Unless you handpick you’re calendar, you may end up with a Sh***y one, but above that, why do we have them. I mean, it sounds good right, little chocolates for every day of the month, but heres the thing, can you actually bother to open them every day of the month. Though it doesn’t require a lot of effort, it can be a little unnecessary, though you can counter this. What I did is that I opened every box in my calendar at the 13th, and subsequently ate the chocolates inside. Why, so I don’t have to remember for every day. I get it over and done with, quick as the flash without any testicles, and though you may not agree with me, it’s my philosophy.
Anyway, to cap it off, Christmas is nearly consumed by greed, and basically you have to suck its holly-jolly B***sack. End of discussion
And that should cover it for this entry, and this year in fact. Wow, what a great year we’ve had, a whole nine entries. God Im brilliant. But anyway, to wrap up everything (No joke intended FTW), I hope everyone has a Happy Christmas, and leaves me some comments, cos’ hey, they’re better then unnecessary gifts, lol. And lets look to 2010, the year that I hope this blog will take off.
As a final Christmas present to you, my fans, Im going to reveal 5 entries that will be coming in 2010 (Though not in that particular order)
PSP vs DS review
Scrubs part 2- J.D
Doctor Who (With extra parts)
Social Networking sites
The 10’s (You figure out what it means)
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